I read a story of a lady who got a gig to do makeup for a bride somewhere. The problem came when she was supposed to get paid for the service she provided
The bride wanted to pay cash, and she didn’t take cash (probably for safety reasons and other business accounting management), so the groom was called to assist. To her surprise, it was her boyfriend. The groom in that wedding was her boyfriend, getting married to someone else
In realizing who she was, he quickly offered to transfer the money to the bride instead of directly to the service provider, probably trying to get out of the room as quickly as possible. At that moment, she realized, probably through the reference, that it’s the lady who’s been interfering with their relationship, supposedly as a friend. Maybe she was told not to worry about it
She was stunned to see the uncles on her way out at the wedding, because they knew her. To her surprise, they didn’t even say “our nephew is marrying someone else”
That was horrible. Men are horrible. We are horrible as men, so are women. How could you do such a thing, marrying someone else without even telling the person who always believed she was the one? How do you do that?
I sympathize with the lady, really, I do. I can imagine how she felt from that moment, the tears, the heartbreak, but I just want to hear the other side of the story. I want to understand why the boyfriend felt comfortable doing such a horrible thing, because when you dig deeper into these kinds of situations, you always find more than what meets the eye
I hear and read about these stories a lot, where a woman will say she’s been with a man for a decade or more, and he went on and married someone else, whom he met three months ago
In some cases, a man will say she’s been with this woman for so long, and she refused to have a baby with him, and she goes on to have a baby with someone she just met, barely a month after they broke up
For so long, I’ve wondered how people become so heartless, how they do such a thing to another human being, but life is the great teacher. Believe them when they say that
Here is my take on the subject
We all have these amazing people in our lives. They love us, they protect us in their own ways. They play very important roles in their unique ways. They support us, they do all wonderful things
Sometimes in plain sight, sometimes when we are not looking. They want recognition for their efforts, sometimes it's out of their kindness, but we don’t appreciate them because we want more. We want better, and then one day they meet someone who wants way less than what they’ve been expected, demanded, and asked from them
They meet someone who just listens, someone who chose them over everything, someone who laugh to that joke they were told its stupid and not funny. They meet someone who just wants them, who finds them enough as they are, and they immediately take action because they don’t want to lose that person. They suddenly find everything they have been looking for, waiting to find
Imagine being the only one to call to check up on them, the good morning and good night calls all come from you. If you didn't call, it means you won't hear from them. Everything you do falls short of their expectations, and suddenly find someone who meets you halfway, appreciates every little effort you make, would you look back? Probably not
Relationships are funny, they always work out just fine at the beginning, but have a tendency to die a slow death, mostly due to the egos of the people involved, turning the whole thing into who was right and wrong
As one friend keeps saying, it's all gloomy at the beginning until everything changes
Men blame women when a relationship fails, and women blame men when a relationship ends. Nobody ever wanna take the responsibility to say I was the reason it failed
Ask any man why he left her. It's always her fault. She did all the horrible things
Ask any woman why she left him. It's his fault. He did all the unspeakable things
It's never about what they both failed to do
You hear things like Baby mamas are toxic, baby daddies are horrible, but I just wanna hear the other side of the story because yeah, it’s a lot that we come across out there
I can tell you now, if they have been single for too long, it's safe to try to understand why, before committing yourself, because that doesn’t translate to good behaviour. Sometimes they have been single for that long because a lot have tried and realised being with them was gonna be too much to bear
You find yourself thinking maybe the person who left wasn’t that bad, they just couldn’t handle this mess, that’s why they left
The thing is, as people, we always choose to go where there’s less resistance. We want a soft life, we want all the easy things, but we don’t want to suffer while getting them
Everybody wants to be loved, to be appreciated, to feel that they’re enough, they matter, and they leave when they can't get that
If you’re in a relationship and think you want it to last forever, make it easy for the person you love to love you. Make it easy for all the things you need in your relationship to find you. Make yourself available for all the things you want, to find you and always manage your expectations well, because plenty of times, what you’re going around searching for is right in front of you, it's been there, but you’ve been too busy searching to realise that
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