“What you don’t know, won’t hurt you” I’ve heard that proverb for so many times, but it always leaves me perplexed when I practice it, or when I try to analyze it. Because I always find that “what you don’t know will break you down”, consume all your time and energy while giving you nothing in return.

As a kid, I had a fantasy of being a great soccer player, I even took my time to play soccer with the hope that one day somebody will recognize my potential and help me pursue my talent. Unfortunately, like most black kids who grew up in rural areas, I played it on the dust and ended up there, on the dust. It never materialized to be something I had hoped it would become.

I wanted to be a great musician, to leave a mark on planet earth like the well celebrated Tupac Shakur, Notorious Big, Brenda Fassie, Rebecca Malope and all other hard-working musicians you don’t regret spending your money supporting their music, but I was too shy to even stand in front of my classmates, tell a five minutes long unprepared speech or read a page long poem. Maybe the classroom used to shake, making my voice vibrate until it disappears because I remember shaking the whole time while standing there.

I dreamt of being a very successful farmer with countless cows, goats, chickens, sheep and a very beautiful and attractive garden filled with vegetables and all sorts of fruits in it. I went as far as constantly planting different types of vegetables season after season in my garden during my high school days. But that too never progressed that far because you always get to a point where you have to choose between talent, dreams, hobbies and education, and of course, education always win. Unfortunately, when we choose, we don’t always get proper guidance as to what to choose that will align with our talents and dreams but what we think has more job opportunities and good pay.

I loved cars dearly, I thought by now I would have five, six or more cars in my garage. But having a spanner and grease all over my body wasn’t a thing for me, so admired cars and people fixing them from a distance and that was it. When I would watch my uncle stripping an engine and put it back with zero interest to what he was doing. It never occurred to me that one day I might need that knowledge to maintain my own car until now.

I loved poems, reading a good book, but only when someone else was reading for me. I never thought I’ll one day sit behind the desk, grinding my teeth, trying to come up with words to write my own poem. As a result, I wasted a lot of time playing in the class than grabbing the skills and knowledge that could help me with what turned to be my hobby. When I would ask all the possible questions a teacher might ask before we start reading a story in the class to avoid the same questions being asked back to me.

But turned out all those wasted moments will be what I’m desperately chasing today, and some were just a waste of my time I would have used to do something better. But I didn’t know, as a result, I abandoned what I should have held on to, chased what I shouldn’t have bothered myself with. All because I didn’t know.

If I knew I wasn’t gonna get far with soccer, I wouldn’t have wasted my time trying to make something out of it. If I knew I’ll one day be all over the place searching for people to supply my potential businesses with those chickens, eggs and vegetables, I would have taken my own farming activities seriously. I wouldn’t have listened to anyone who told me that maths and science for a good career path was the best, but focused on my raw talent and developed it. Who knows, maybe by now I would have been supplying to major places than begging people to open their doors so I can buy, but I didn’t know.

I certainly wouldn’t have bothered the young beautiful lady I met in a taxi many years ago. I wouldn’t have tried to get her attention, even go as far as making her my girl because that turned out to be a heartache as she squashed my heart like a sponge. But I didn’t know, as a result, I drag trouble into my life, something I could have just avoided. In fact, if I knew she was trouble, I would have taken another taxi or walk home that day, but I didn’t know.

So tell me again that what you don’t know won’t hurt you.